I never told Bart what I was going through. One day he brought me in a verse that read, "But the God of all grace, who has called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that you have suffered a while, make you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you." I Peter 5:10 I had to turn the hallway to head to my guitar class. He handed me the scripture tab and I read it as I crossed the threshold into the classroom. It said "suffer". I knew I was suffering, but then it also said, "a while". That little phrase, "a while" was all I had to hear. This meant the suffering had an end. I didn't know how or when, but that didn't matter to me, what mattered was that I knew it had an ending. I knew some way, some how, some day I wouldn't feel like this any more. I believed these were God's Words and I believed Him. Where I was hopeless, I now had hope.
I really don't know the timeline of how things happened, but Bart and his girlfriend Gail Moore, gave me a Bible that I began to read diligently. The Lord gave me so much comfort in Psalms and the Gospels of Jesus.
Psalm 91
"He that dwells in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God, in him will I trust. Surely he shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler, and from the noisome pestilence. He shall cover you with his feathers, and under his wings shall you trust: his truth shall be your shield and buckler." And then when I got to the next verse, verse 5, it said, "You shall not be afraid for the terror by night; nor for the arrow that flieth by day;" I thought to myself, "I have nothing to be afraid of! I am covered 24/7! Day and night!
and .... Psalm 27
"The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid? When the wicked, even mine enemies and my foes, came upon me to eat up my flesh, they stumbled and fell. Though an host should encamp against me, my heart shall not fear: though war should rise against me, in this will I be confident. One thing have I desired of the Lord, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord, and to enquire in his temple. For in the time of trouble he shall hide me in his pavilion: in the secret of his tabernacle shall he hide me; he shall set me up upon a rock. And now shall mine head be lifted up above mine enemies round about me: therefore will I offer in his tabernacle sacrifices of joy, I will sing, yea, I will sing praises unto the Lord."
And then the wonderful words of my dear Savior, Jesus:
"Let not your heart be troubled: you believe in God, believe also in me. In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there you may be also." Gospel of John 14:1-3
"Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world gives, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid." Gospel of John 14:27
Again, I don't know the time sequence of my life around that year of 1975, but I always remember that I came to turn to Jesus and ask Him for help around my 17th birthday in September. I suppose this next event could be found out by calling the Billy Graham Association to see the date of the broadcast where Rev. Graham spoke about angels in his sermon and mentioned a book he recently wrote about them. Bart and Gail had invited me to go to church with them for the first time and were due to pick me up the next day, as I recall. That night, so I believe it was a Saturday night, I sat and watched TV in the living room as the sounds of faint laughter and dice clunking on the laminate table came from the dining room where my Aunt Anne, cousin Anna May and my mother played a game of Yahtzee. Anna May was visiting from Long Island. This was during a time where I could make it through the day pretty well, but when bedtime came I couldn't use the day's distractions to make me stop being so fearful and miserable. At this time there were also some commercial jingles and songs on the radio I clung onto for hope. So, that night, I'm watching a Billy Graham broadcast for probably the first time in my life and listened. I remember at the end of the program saying, "Jesus, you've got to help me!" As I cried and said those words, Jesus, came into the room. I never looked up, but I knew He was in a white robe. He was above me to the left in the corner of the room by the ceiling as I was facing the TV crying out to Him. I felt comforted, knew He was there, and felt He was going to help me. I wiped the tears from my eyes and went to bed. The following day at a church evening service, Bart and Gail said to me, do I want to accept Jesus as my Savior. I said, "Yes." and went to the front of the church where prayer was being held and people were receiving Jesus.
I believe all in the same year and in fact probably in that summer of 1975, I had another experience. It was a beautiful blue sky, sunny, summer day as I went out the back door of our house located in Malta, NY. We had a part white husky dog named "Snow" that I went to tend to as he was tied out in the yard on a tree.
As I turned to head back into the house, out of the sky, all I can say is it came from way up there, out of Heaven, God spoke to me. Now you may say, how did you know it was God? I just knew. And He said to me, "Do you want this?" and to my left side in front of me was this dark area. It was completely black. It had no light in it. It had nothing happy in it. It had nothing joyful in it. It was black, horrible, and totally void of any peace or comfort. It was a place of unrest and torment. And then He said, "Or Me?" and I said out loud, "You!" and almost immediately with my eyes wide open I saw a vision of a black book and on it was written, "Holy Bible". And after that nothing happened. That was it.
I never really told anyone this except maybe one person, but recently have been sharing it with people and also my experiences I have had and verses from that Holy Bible. My hope is that others will come to the same acceptance of Jesus so they can not only have Him as their "friend that sticks closer than a brother" and Savior in this life, but also in the life to come. To go to that place called Heaven that God spoke out of and Jesus describes as He's "going to prepare a place for you." to those that believe. All you have to do is ask Jesus to save you. Believe He is the Son of God Who came to bring you into fellowship with God by His atoning death, burial and resurrection. "For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." Romans 3:23 "All they that call upon the Lord shall be saved." Romans 10:13 "There is only one name under heaven given among men whereby we must be saved." Acts 4:12 "For there is one God, and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus" I Timothy 2:5 And the very "Words of Jesus" who Himself said, "I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father except through Me." Gospel of John 14:6 and also the Gospel of John 3: 16-18 where Jesus also states, "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. For God didn't send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved. He who believes in Him is not condemned, but he who does not believe is condemned already because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God." God is trustworthy. His Word is true. He sent His Son because He loves us.
Prayer: (in your own words) "Jesus help me. I know you can. I know I can trust you for my salvation. I know you paid a tremendous price for me because you love me and want me to have fellowship with God the Father. I believe you are the Son of God and that you died and rose again to be the door and entryway for me to God. I believe you, trust you and take you as my Savior. Thank you. Amen."
If you prayed to the Lord for salvation, find a Bible and start reading it for yourself and learn more about your Savior Jesus. You can start right in the New Testament with the 4th section, the Gospel of John. If you have any questions please feel free to contact us on the "Contact" tab. Gods blessings upon you.